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I Don’t Get Wholeness… That’s the Problem: Making Relationships Work By Paula White Book Review

In I Don’t Get Wholeness… That’s the Problem, Paula White looks at the fundamentals of healthy relationships that we permit in our life. Paula White has had to endure and overcome the negative voices who tried to tear her down and stop her from fulfilling her destiny. Her father committed suicide when she was just five years old and she also suffered from being sexual abused by other men in her life. She learned how to start developing healthy relationships that pushed her to go further and higher. In healthy relationships, we must have the freedom to be ourselves, let others be themselves, and display the concept of letting others change and grow. The book is written to help readers to achieve wholeness first and to receive what God declares about us. If you’re not whole, then your relationships won’t be whole and healthy either. It’s vital that we stop looking for outside sources to repair the inner issues. She also explored three ways to break generational curses that have been placed by previous generations. Nine keys to healthy relationships were included in this book to demonstrate what wholeness actually looks like.

Some of my favorite quotes are:

“If I am going to change my behavior, I have to change my beliefs” (Page 32).

“If you don’t acknowledge the inaccurate message in your life, you cannot defeat it” (Page 75).

“When God wants to bless you, He sends a person into your life. When Satan wants to mess you up, he sends a person into your life” (Page 91).

“You cannot conquer what you don’t confront, and you cannot confront what you don’t identify” (Page 107).

I would recommend this life enlightening book to anyone struggling to form healthy relationships. This book showed readers how to identity dysfunctional family patterns and relationships. I found that I have to state my expectations when I enter into relationships. I realized that one of the reasons is because I fear being let down and disappointed. The book revealed that I have trouble receiving compliments but it’s ironic if they speak something negative, I receive it as truth! This book was extremely helpful in exposing many of the lies that I have believed and I realized that I have to replace the lies with the truth of God’s Word. Strongholds were broken when I started standing and rejecting the lies! The generational curses chapter assisted me in stopping the curses from repeating. The book enclosed tons of scriptures to breaking the past curses from my forefathers. Blessing can actually be released! If you’re longing to be completely whole in your relationships then this book will be a huge benefit in helping you obtain wholeness! I loved how Paula White isn’t a preacher and an author who tells you what you want to hear! She isn’t afraid to confront the dysfunctional issues and she speaks the truth that we desperately don’t need sugarcoated or downplayed. If this astonishing book is applied it can truly change the structure of your relationships! Healthy relationships will be established.

If you would like to purchase a copy of I Don’t Get Wholeness… That’s the Problem then check it out on




So glad to see this book left a positive impact and that God used it to reveal a few areas of change in your life. I like Paula White very much and appreciate her direct and honest manner. Though I had not heard of this book, after your review I plan to put this one on my "to-read" list.



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