Making Great Decisions is written to guide readers into realistic expectations towards your relationships and researching who they really truly are. People will always reveal and display their feelings through their thoughts, words, behaviors, and actions. Bishop Jakes is a firm believer in asking the important questions and then weighing the response we receive in our relationships. Often times we fail to ask our dating partners the right kind of questions, then we are shocked when later they share their own opinions and ideas in marriage. It’s critical that we must accept responsibility for where we are currently in life and not to easily shift the blame to our parents or our spouse. Blaming doesn’t help our relationships improve it only hinders our personal growth process. One of the essentials before we date is to deal with our own hurts, disappointments, regrets, and pain from past experiences and relationships. Freedom comes when we heal and let go of the need to justify and reimburse our deepest pain. It’s vital in realizing that the new relationship can’t fix the old relationship issues. Don’t take out your frustration on the people who didn’t cause the harm to you in the first place! Bishop Jakes described that many people are wearing emotional condoms to protect themselves from future hurts and disappointments. As we get older it tends to get harder and harder to fall in love again. This book provides the fundamental keys for entering dating, marriage, having children, career, buying a house, and many other helpful tools. This book also contained twenty questions to ask before you get engaged.
I would recommend this life enhancing relationship book to anyone thinking about dating and is planning on getting married someday. Marriage is an enormous commitment that many of us don’t take seriously enough. We are all longing to connect deeper to a partner but we forget to ask the significant questions before we say I do. I do have just become words without meaning and we are failing to grasp the impact of keeping our word! Sickness and in health, rich or poor actually means something who would have thought.
I especially loved the transparency Bishop Jakes showed throughout this book. He compared the woman in the Bible having ten coins and she lost one coin to people searching for their marriage partner. She kept looking for her lost coin until she found it. Bishop Jakes helped me to see that it is perfectly normal to be honest that I do want a relationship. Finding someone to date and marry is a risk but it’s worth taking. Part of discovering a marriage partner you want is to research and study your relationship.
I immensely enjoyed the twenty questions to ask before you get engaged. One of my favorite questions was, “What do you expect?” Many times I am expecting that my spouse will be just like me and be interested in the same type of things or hobbies that I take pleasure in. Meanwhile, she is expecting me to act a certain way and I usually don’t even know she was expecting. And she doesn’t know what I’m expecting! It can be complicating but as a marriage couple you have to learn to describe and communicate what each other is expecting in your relationship. Another question Bishop Jakes shared was, “What are your ideas about sexuality”? Before reading this book, I never would have even considered asking this type of question before engagement. I would have waiting until marriage then I would have encountered disappointment and my expectations would have caused great conflict. Sex is an aspect of a healthy marriage but it isn’t only the end goal. Marriage is much more than just sex and procreation.
This book had many features and imperative questions we must ask each other before we arrive at the altar to say I do. Though the questions presented in this book may be difficult at times to ask and answer, failing to have a discussion leads to confusion and conflict down the road in marriage. I am single and I have already decided that before I get engaged we will be going through these questions together as a couple. This book will strength your dating relationships and assist you in deeming who you will marry. Marriage and choosing who to spend the rest of your life with is a gigantic decision we can’t take lightly. We have to investigate our dating relationships and watch for the signs of who they truly are! Pay attention to the clues!! If you’re looking for a marriage partner, please read this book you will be blessed and forever changed and you will learn the skills and tools to succeed in marriage and other important decisions!
If you would like to purchase a copy of Making Great Decisions check it out on Amazon.com or Christian Book: